Real joy and satisfaction...

In being who and what I am. A mom. I'm completely engulfed in everything "mom" right now. Four years ago this week I remember what it felt like to cry my eyes out wanting so badly to be a mommy. Some days I felt like maybe it wasn't really meant for me... I wasn't meant to be a mom and it was really hard on me. Everyday I have two sweet angels fall asleep on my right arm as I read them nap-time stories and my heart feels like it might burst out of my chest I'm so happy and in love and blessed. Some experiences in life really don't seem fair at the time but because of them, later you appreciate things more.
  Last year right now I was working full time and commuting to Salt Lake. Again wondering and worrying if actually getting to be a mom was in my cards. Today I have 2 clean, fed, napping girls, a clean house, and a heart so full of joy I'm almost in tears. Savana recited the whole first article of faith to me. Ate all of her lunch like a champ and went down for a nap like an angel. Annie slept all night. Has smiled at me at least 100 times flashing her beautiful little dimple and has not fussed, whined or cried all day and she is snoring a little bit in her sleep at this moment and I can't help but smile.
  Savana is such a little smarty pants. I used to question if she really listened to me, ever! But she shows me in so many ways that she understands, knows and remembers the things I teach her. One big help is the spirit in our house every day. I'm just so proud of my little 2 year old for knowing so much! She knows all the First Presidency, all the quorum of the 12 by face and name, along with the Book of Mormon prophets, most Bible prophets, her numbers, alphabet, LOTS of songs - she sings all day sometimes. She loves learning new songs. She got a microphone for Christmas and has been such the little Taylor Swift - singing songs, making up songs, talking to me in song. She is great. She has such a sweet voice and sounds just like an angel.

 Savana baking a pie with her grandma :)

 Annie was orange at first so we put her in the sunshine :)

 Christmas Eve jammies!

 Oh Santa got Savana the Rapunzel doll she wanted so badly.

 Geoff and Annie opening Christmas presents.

 Savana and her doll, and other presents from Santa. Clearly Rapunzel was very appreciated! Although for those of you know about Savana and Flynn Rider....A few minutes after she opened Rapunzel she looked at us and asked where Flynn was. Haha! Love her!

 My new picture

 1st time fishing with dad! (over the couch for Swedish fish)

 Her tent. We had a family camping night. Hotdogs and smores, fishing and tent making! SO FUN!

 Sweet cousins! Abby and Tessa! LOVE THEM!

 Annie's blessing day. January 8th. It was perfect.

 We were so glad Grandma and Jerry could come!

 Wonderful priesthood holders!

 Daddy Kiss!

 Best sister friends!

 My precious girls melt my heart!

 Annie will be 3 month old day after tomorrow. WOW how time flies! I can't even believe it. She is a great little eater and sleeper. She is quite the mommy's girl. I can't leave much, its too hard on her, she misses me. Some days I feel a little cooped up but I honestly don't mind it - I like it. I get to snuggle my girls all day! I do have some spring fever in that I really dislike cold weather. I love having my windows open for fresh air. I'm still crossing my fingers an amazing job opens up in St. George for Geoff and we can live in the sunshine :) I told Savana I had spring fever today and she said "I'm sorry you are sick mama!" (felt my forehead) and told me to drink plenty of fluids. Geoff and I both had a pretty good laugh. But spring will come and once again I will go on 3-4 walks a day to enjoy sunshine and fresh air. Savana loves going on walks. She tells me all sorts of things while we are out and about. I'm sure Annie will love it too :) For now we are snuggled under several blankets with warm clothes on and enjoying time together in our little home. Life is wonderful. Every minute!